Titus 2:3 “Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. “

In this Scripture we see the word “reverent” – it’s quite significant that we find it here. The word reverence as described in the dictionary means: deep respect for someone or something. This is a deep respect that we should have of course learned when we were growing up with our earthly fathers around us all the time. We can easily assume that a woman should know how to have deep reverence for God because she would have learned this from her earthly father right? But what if she didn’t? What if this relationship did not exist for one reason or another? 

I grew up knowing my father, he wasn’t married to my mom, but I met for the first time when I was 10 years old. As we grew together in our relationship I discovered how amazing he was as a man, but not without his struggles. He was far from perfect but he was a good man, who was not consistent though. As a child I grew up knowing that I needed to take my report card to his side of the family so I could get validation and a bit of money (my payment for good grades) whether he was there or not. I didn’t know at the time that this was my way of seeking validation. A way to make me feel valued and seen. It hits me now, in my forties as I study this Scripture and this WORD REVERENCE jumps at me. You guessed it, this is how my relationship with Jesus has been.  

Over time I kept thinking that if I put on a show for Him, He will love me. He will appreciate me, He will never leave me or remain consistent. Is this sometimes how we are with God? We think it’s about what we do, how we do it, when all He wants is us, in totality. The Book of Romans is clear that:  For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. Romans 6:14 ESV. So the more I perform is actually the furthest I am getting from the Lord, His Love and Grace in its purest form. It is this performance that led me not to believe that God can love me when I fall, but to think that He actually abandons me. When I fall I come before Him with my report card so He can validate me enough and not abandon me – spot the connection? 

When we hear the incorrect doctrine that says it is about performance, we tend to believe it because simply trusting that God loves you it’s difficult to fathom. OH BUT HE DOES! HE TRULY DOES! He clothed Adam and Eve after they had sinned so why would He not do that for you? 

Jesus didn’t die for a perfect world but He for sinners. It was not about the perfect part of creation but it was about you and I. The ones who view themselves as unlovable at times. The ones who seem to be so far gone, because we often forget that nothing is too hard for our God.  

So as you page through the content here, I want you to know that we are all on a journey towards healing. Healing is not neat, it is messy. It can leave us with all kinds of brokenness revealed but that’s the whole point, to expose it so it heals. We have the Holy Spirit to help us and we can do it. You are not alone, let us heal together so we reverence the Lord appropriately and correctly together. 
No matter what you are facing right now, know that He is God, He is Jehovah Rafah and HE HEALS! 

Love 

BZ